1. My car always reeks like coffee.
2. My cardigan has a hole in it. (more holes = more hipster)
3. Oh shet. My TOMS shoes are going to get ruined in this rain. (should’ve waterproofed ‘em)
4. Barnes & Nobles is closed.
5. My iPod died so I can’t listen to City and Colour.
6. I only have a dollar left on my Starbucks card.
7. I got black coffee all over my H&M scarf.
8. Somehow I got food stuck in my beard.
9. My Vampire Weekend t-shirt doesn’t go with my blazer & workman boots. And my glasses that I don’t need for seeing broke so now I have to tape them like Harry Potter.
10. Only hipsters hate hipsters and will deny being a hipster. Proving that they’re a hipster.
11. Obscure music isn’t obscure enough and eventually will gain notoriety.
12. I spend all my money on coffee and cigarettes.
13. That awkward moment when you pass another guy wearing skinny jeans…
14. Which pair of Raybans do I wear with this pair of leggings?
15. How do you expect me to survive without any circa?
16. I hope I don’t become sterile from wearing extremely tight skinny jeans all the time.
17. It takes so much effort to pull off this effortless look.
18. I invented the distressed jean look. Not Hollister. Not Abercrombie.
19. Being mainstream isn’t cool.
20. Not being able to share your favorite music with your friends in fear that it will become mainstream.
21. Trying to be different is harder than you think.
22. When an amateur serves you your coffee and it tastes terrible.
23. Deciding what your next piercing will be.
24. When your teacher awkwardly puts a square on the chalkboard. I WANT A FUCKING TRIANGLE! ▲
25. Youtube became too mainstream to view my obscure videos. Now what?
26. I don’t know which porch to lurk on.
27. Shet. When we were kissing my lip ring got stuck in your lip ring.
28. To shave or not to shave?
29. It’s not 420.
30. My music is so obscure that I can’t even find a place to download it.
31. They raised the cigarette prices… again.
32. My boyfriend wrote me an indie love song. We broke up because it was too commercial.
33. Too many people know about Tumblr.
34. Know so many songs, can’t remember artist, google lyrics… too indie for Google.
35. Getting mistaken for a homeless person. Typical.
36. Being a hipster is losing its obscurity.
37. Ugh. I hate when my keffiyeh doesn’t keep me warm enough.
38. Cappuccino or latte? Life changing decision.
39. Nobody realizes how smart hipsters really are. It’s obscure.
40. I don’t have enough bracelets on my wrists.
41. My skinny jeans have cut off the circulation to my feet.
42. I ran out of beer*. (*obscure beer).
43. There’s no more film in my camera.
44. That awkward moment when you actually like something that’s mainstream. (lol jk!)
45. I find triangles sexy.
46. Deciding whether you should wear pants or not…
47. It’s too windy to make smoke rings.
48. My extensions got most knotty.
49. Do indians park their cars in teepees?
50. I spilled coffee all over myself.
51. Volkswagens are becoming way too conformist for me to drive anymore. (Especially GTI’s).
52. You know you’re stressed when you can’t even play Tiny Wings.
53. Dammit. I scuffed my oxfords.
54. I’ve never been on time to a talent show.
55. When newspapers only tell you the same conformist, mainstream shet over and over again.
56. I hate being home.
57. (RT RT RT RETWEEEET). No. You just made my tweet mainstream. #thanksalot
58. Coughing after ripping and obese boge. That shet sucks most.
59. Even hipsters get lonely sometimes.
60. Trying to understand how autotune is cool. Nope. Still don’t understand.
61. My teacher won’t let me listen to my music during class.
62. Somebody called me a square the other day. And I screamed triangle.
63. Everyone is getting feather extensions. Time to take mine out!
64. You like Coldplay? We can’t be friends. :/
65. When people say “fin.” You’re not deck at all.
66. I went to buy American Spirits the other day, and they were out of stock. Now what?
67. That awkward moment when you end up in a rural area and can’t find an urban setting anywhere. Fin.
68. I hate how after I shower all my awesome natural hair greases are no longer there.
69. I like them before they were cool.
70. Homework is so cliché. That’s why I don’t do it.
71. All my problems are being reblogged. Now I’m becoming mainstream. My whole life is a lie!
72. When my favorite underground band’s song comes on in a store.
73. I hate when I start a trend and then it becomes mainstream.
74. I missed 11:11.
75. My jeans are too tight to roll up and go for a bike ride.
76. Realizing how awesome all your followers are. But then remembering you’re a hipster… so you’re better.
77. A friend of mine got the same YACHT tattoo as me. NO LONGER FRIENDS.
78. Which cardigan do I wear today?
79. One cigarette left. Spent all your money on Pabst the night before. Crap.
80. I don’t understand why coffee shops even have a closing time. They should stay open 24/7.
81. When people confuse hipsters with scene. They are not anything alike…
82. I whipped my hair back and forth way before it became a song.
83. “You laugh at me because I’m different; I laugh because you’re all the same.” - Daniel Knode
84. When hipsters still deny they’re a hipster. We went over this. YOU ARE MOST DEFINITELY A HIPSTER.
85. Um why are the most random people getting gauges?
86. When regular people don’t realize how amazing triangles are.
87. If a bunch of people find a puppy cute, does that make it a mainstream dog?
88. I make up my own vocabulary all the time, so people never understand anything I’m talking about.
89. Trying to think of new, creative hipster problems.
90. I hate when I’m writing a song, and I get writer’s block or it sounds way too mainstream.
91. Tri. Ang. Les. EVERYWHERE. ▲
92. I’m sad that Spongebob is mainstream. Because I actually like that guy. His square pants are so obscure.
93. While I was shaving, I accidentally shaved a bit of my mustache.
94. Why is black and white film so expensive?
95. You know how only hipsters deny being hipsters? I hate when people who aren’t hipsters, claim to be.
96. Too much SW▲G.
97. Am I the only one who thinks about why words like torrential are even invented? It either describes rain… or your period.
98. As well as my music being too obscure to find a place to download, it also is too obscure that it isn’t even on iTunes.
99. My vision is perfectly fine but I still choose to wear eyeglasses, even though they’re not necessary.
100. ▲ + ▲ = ▀ (Wtf).
101. Is your name too generic? Just spell it backwards. (ex: Tom → Mot).
102. So many art assignments, so little time.
103. When my boat doesn’t have an anchor.
104. I hate when I can’t find the appropriate barret for a cross-country train ride.
105. If anyone has noticed, all these problems are in Helvetica. The most generic font. What now? I see a change in the near future…
106. I just don’t get it. Why does everyone see being a hipster as a bad thing? Are you jealous?
107. Why is marijuana considered a drug?
108. What the feck. Everyone is getting a hookah lately. Time to throw mine out!
109. Deciding on what your next tattoo will consist of.
110. I hate when people say hipsters are gross. Get real. Have you seen them? They are so attractive. Even if you don’t like us, I know you are secretly checking us out.
111. Straight edge is too mainstream. Hand me a PBR tall can.
112. I don’t have enough money to develop my film; or buy film for that matter.
113. What do I tell people, when they ask if my glasses are real or not?
114. I found that drinking coffee was becoming too mainstream… so I’ve just started eating coffee grounds instead.
115. Everyone either has a dog or a cat. Those are too mainstream. That’s why I have a zebra!
116. Why the hell did New York ban smoking in public environments? I’m moving to Europe.
117. Trying to find “what’s good” for tonight.
118. Worrying about a blow out when stretching your gauge bigger.
119. Have you ever noticed that any “Heather” you know has huge tits?
120. What’s up with those random bitches who are just mean to hipsters for no reason at all? Don’t be jealous our lives are of higher quality.
121. Stop remixing music.
122. Black coffee > Flavored coffee/additives.
123. Black is a very controversial color. It doesn’t mean I’m “emo” for liking it.
124. I can’t stand people who have music that plays on their tumblr. Unfollow instantly.
125. I deleted my Facebook because everyone has one. (But seriously, I did this).
126. The only person who understands my fixation with triangles is Pink Floyd.
127. I say I want new friends, so I try and meet new people. But I soon realize that they suck and my friends are the shit.
128. All my teachers yell at me for drawing triangles on my papers.
129. When I get too stressed out from homework, I end up doing nothing at all.
130. Never drink with hipsters. We get too fucked up.
131. I think way too much.
132. What is Nutella? It sounds mainstream to me.
133. Old bong water.
134. Not getting what you want. Or getting what everyone else already has.
135. There’s no Urban Outfitters near me.
136. It’s called an “inside-joke” for a reason. You are clearly on the outside.
137. I go to bed at 2 in the morning and somehow manage to wake up at 5 am. Coffee, where you at?
138. PARRRRRTYYYY BETCHESS! (stfu).
139. Don’t understand my vocabulary? Let’s clear thing up: fin - wack, lame; deck - cool, awesome; mainstream - shouldn’t exist; obscure - should exist.
140. Uggs. Need I say more?
141. My piercings latched onto the clothing I was wearing. Ouch.
142. I’m too nice to people who don’t deserve it.
143. Ke$ha is NOT a hipster.
144. I need more TOMS shoes in different colors.
145. The more miss-matchy your outfit, the more hipster you look.
146. My bike has a flat tire.
147. I broke my lipstick.
148. I’m scared to get a Fixie because I don’t know how to stop without brakes.
149. I save money by wearing only thrifted clothes, but still, it’s expensive to look this homeless and underfed!
150. I spend a lot on coffee/cigarettes, so I try to save money. But I can only buy Tom’s of Maine health products, Meyer’s cleaning products, and vegan-fed eggs, so my wallet is empty.
151. The gas station is all out of Marlboro Skylines. Eh now what?
152. I ran out of room on my ribcage for more tattoos.
153. If you call yourself a hipster, then you’re definitely not a hipster.
154. When your friend doesn’t clear the bong.
155. No one asked you.
156. I moved from Facebook to Tumblr because I don’t like the people I know.
157. People follow me everywhere because I’m just that cool.
158. The hair salon butchered my vogue hair style.
159. That awkward moment when one of your friends doesn’t have the bass turned all the way up. (What’s the point of music then?).
160. Ugh. Why did Lights ever have to become mainstream?
161. My future soul mate is probably like “wtf?” at me being a hipster blogger with problems.
162. I hate when people are around when I set up my hookah and they want to rip it, but I clearly do not want their mouth on my hose. Get out.
163. Sorry, I can’t give you a ride. Besides I have a bicycle not a car, duh!
164. Stop photoshopping yourself. Embrace who you are.
165. I burnt my hair from straightening too much.
166. Yes, I comb my hair. No, I haven’t skipped a shower. Maybe, I think you’re an asshole.
167. I smell like teen spirit. (Problem? I think not. Necessary? I think so.).
168. Stop bumming cigarettes off me.
169. Should I wear my worker-boots today or my TOMS or my Vans or my sandals?
170. Songs with repeating verses.
171. The café that I normally go to every day has run out of Joe Tea’s.
172. When people try and introduce me to music that I’ve liked forever, then I suddenly hate that music.
173. Taking all your hand-made bracelets off before showering so that they don’t smell like wet dog later.
174. I hate when I run out of change to buy my morning peace tea.
175. When people confuse me for a girl.
176. When people confuse me for a boy.
177. I live in a city with a terrible music scene.
178. It’s almost 4th of July and Urban Outfitters is all out of patriotic leggings.
179. My teacher prints tests in Comic Sans. Nope, too mainstream. Not taking it.
180. Don’t talk to me if you aren’t going to be gramatically correct.
181. For those of you who aren’t 18 yet, buying cigarettes is a difficult problem.
182. Not focusing perfectly when taking pictures on your SLR camera.
183. Canon vs. Nikon. Tough decision.
184. Girls: Stop wearing floral stitched tights with everything. They no longer look good since everyone wears them now.
185. Art > Sports.
186. The “earth” without “art” is just “eh.”
187. Just be yourself. Don’t follow trends or be mainstream. Invent your own style.
188. That awkward moment when the barista handing you your cappuccino has the same mustache as you.
189. They don’t make triangular loaves of bread. No toast for this hipster.
190. My fixie needs greasing, but WD-40 is clearly too mainstream for these chains.
191. Shit. I totally just missed my train because I was too busy smoking a cigarette outside.
192. That awkward moment when someone gets a tattoo and you have to pretend you like it.
193. I’m not 18 yet so I have to go to the sketchiest place in order to get another piercing.
194. It’s hard to like someone when all they like is mainstream music. Music defines a person. If you only like music because everyone else does, then you have no individuality.
195. Uhm $5 just for a coffee in the city? WHAT.
196. The piercer totally pierced my piercing crooked.
197. So you know how everyone hates bums who beg for money in the city? Today I ran out of money for a bus ticket so I had to beg people to spare some change. Huge problem.
198. I’m starting to like Jamba Juice more than I like coffee. I’m not too sure about this?
199. People who get in your way when you’re walking around the city.
200. Everyone stares at me. I think they’re jealous.
201. Ran out of cigarettes today. That’s alright. I’m in the city and I can grub off of everyone until I fill up my pack again. Problem solved!
202. Jersey Shore.
203. The guy I like is on a date with another girl. She is extremely mainstream. WTF?
204. I love art and all, but the MoMA is seriously the most boring museum ever.
205. “Guys this is my favorite band” (me). “ME TOO” (them). “Really? You know this band?” (me, shuts off music and never listens to it again).
206. I got my piercings/tattoos in this little 2x4 room. Sketchy? Yes. Worth it? Yes.
207. Is my name too unique for you that you can’t even pronounce it correctly?
208. I’m starting to think wearing any clothes at all is mainstream. Start a naked trend?
209. Drinking coffee is fogging up my glasses.
210. I need friends who like staying up late and don’t mind getting their photos taken.
211. Holy crap it’s a triangle OMG so hipster can’t breathe AHH freaking triangle.
212. I liked film before it was digital.
213. Drive-In theaters > Movie theaters.
214. Exercise doesn’t fit into my relaxation lifestyle.
215. No, I was not crying when I got my septum pierced… it just made my eyes water.
216. I wear my beanie hat in 70° weather.
217. Dear people who are always depressed no matter what: please steer clear of me. I like being happy.
218. Taxis are so mainstream. That’s why I walk or ride my bike everywhere.
219. Why isn’t Harry Potter real?
220. If something you like is too mainstream, just flip it upside-down!
221. By the time summer is over, I never have any jeans left because I cut them all into shorts.
222. Caffeine > Drugs.
223. I have so many blisters on my feet from walking around barefoot.
224. If you start begging for followers, I will unfollow you.
225. If being in love only made people more lonely, why would everyone want it so much? Not me.
226. The best music is the music that nobody ever discovers.
227. I hate when I feel like having a lazy day, so I deny hanging out when my friends ask me to. And then they go and do the most epic things and I’m like, why did I say no?
228. When your favorite band comes out with a new album… and it sucks.
229. I should’ve waited until Friday the 13th to get my tattoo, that way it would have been $13.
230. No getting invited when your friends go hiking or something.
231. I’m ashamed of the things I’ve done for a Klondike Bar.
232. Just so you know, hipsters are not as pale as everyone thinks. We get very tan in the summer since we’re always at the beach. We aren’t always in a coffee shop…
233. Being a girl hipster is tough, because all of your friends are guys.
234. Sometimes I realize that being this smart actually sucks. Because then I can’t hold a good conversation with “normal” people.
235. I sit and think about every stupid thing I’ve ever done, sometimes. All at once. And that reminds me how SWEET I am.
236. Ray-Bans or nothing at all.
237. You can never take enough webcam pictures of yourself. Never.
238. All the cool hair dye colors always wash out. What is wrong with this world?
239. I hate when I see clothing I really want on someone and I have no clue where to go and buy it. Off to the thrift stores I guess.
240. Insomnia is always an issue.
241. Can never have enough rings.
242. Unoriginal people.
243. You think you know me? I don’t know me.
244. What the fuck is “GPOY?” I don’t know what it is, but it’s mainstream, and stop saying it.
245. There are not enough days in a week to hang out with all my friends.
246. I hate how people think I’m a mean person just because I walk around with a frown on my face. It’s just my face. Sorry. It was made that way.
247. I hate when I was in the middle of something and then I forgot what I was - Wait what was I doing?
248. Redbull runs through my blood.
249. I’m not sure what book to read?
250. My iPod doesn’t have enough space to fit all of my obscure music.
251. Non-smoking areas.
252. So I went to this food place the other day, and there weren’t any vegan options.
253. When I’m not the only mustache in the room.
254. I wore down the back tire of my fixie shredding the gnar too hard.
255. My favorite band sold out but I still like them. Ironically.
256. Why aren’t you reading my blog? I’m awesome.
257. Why are you reading my blog? Creep.
258. :) ^.^ :D :P :3 c: :] =) ;) :-* Stop fucking smiling. Emoticons are useless.
259. Do you not know how to smile or something? Quit using the duckface.
260. I feel like when I do get ignored, its by everyone all at once.
261. Please just burn these magazines: Seventeen, Vanity Fair, Glamour, Teen Vogue, Bazaar, etc.
262. Tourists, go home.
263. They are out of Reptar bandaids at the store.
264. I don’t know if I like my guitar calluses or not.
265. I don’t have any incense to burn while I drink my coffee. Fuck.
266. To loiter or not to loiter?
267. Low carb diets are cliché. I’m going to only eat pixie sticks.
268. Hmmm. What new language to learn so I can ditch English…
269. Facebook is so tempting, but 600 million people use it.
270. Pitchfork’s service is down.
271. When something isn’t ironic.
272. Wearing TOMS all day = smelly feet later.
273. Apple iPod headphones are the worst headphones in the history of headphones.
274. I’m on a strict coconut water diet to fit into my little sister’s skinny jeans.
275. This venue is too big.
276. No, I did not steal this shirt from a trash can. I got it at Salvation Army!
277. I was going to thank you for the follow, but then I realized how typical that would be.
278. Why did Lost ever have to end? WHY?
279. When your family and non-hipster co-workers start saying “deck” and “fin.”
280. Someone called me a hipster. I denied it, but inside I was satisfied that they noticed.
281. Painting became too mainstream, I switched back to crayons.
282. I hate trying to explain to someone why I use a disposable camera.
283. Awh, dammit. My coffee is halfway finished.
284. So, when the day eventually comes that being a hipster is too mainstream, shall we become mainsters?
285. Animal Collective is becoming too mainstream. :/
286. I have TOMS tan lines on my feet.
287. I’m thinking about unfollowing this one blog. It’s becoming too mainstream…
288. Not being able to make eye-contact because there is a camera in your eye.
289. Grrr. When I’m not the only black hipster chick. Lawls.
290. When I look up Beach House on Google, I’m not looking for pictures of beach houses.
291. No one understands the obscure metaphors in my poetry.
292. Even American Spirits are too mainstream for me to ingest. So I roll my own cigarettes.
293. I hate when my beard doesn’t match my cardigan.
294. Urban Outfitters changed their website layout.
295. My Spanish friend hates on me for laughing in Spanish, jajajajaja. I can’t help it, haha is too mainstream.
296. I wear skinny jeans, a flannel shirt, and a scarf in 98 degree weather.
297. I always lose my good flannel shirt.
298. People are always trying to copy my style.
299. I’d say I love you, but the word love is too mainstream. I am infatuated with you.
300. My phone is so hipster that I don’t get my text messages until hours later.
301. Don’t be a square. ▲
302. What facial expression should I make in my HD camera portrait?
303. Shit, forgot my Tumblr password.
304. I have to switch to cold coffee during the summertime, but then it gets too mainstream so I just drink it hot. Hardcore.
305. My hoodies can never clash with my vans. I always have to make them match.
306. Seeing another hipster and instantly not liking them but secretly wanting to be their friend.
307. When the bands I like are either: dead, retired, or broken up because they’re so old.
308. That odd feeling when you realize someone knows a band that you know.
309. Once the banjo becomes too mainstream, does that mean I should play the sitar?
310. I hate when the hookah bar doesn’t carry my favorite flavor.
311. I liked Weezer BEFORE and AFTER they were cool.
312. Every article of clothing I own has paint on it.
313. Stop with the duck/kissy face, it makes you look like… well… a duck.
314. When people ask me why my skateboard is so long…
315. You think I have too much ink? I don’t care. I think you can never have enough.
316. When people ask me if my skinny jeans hurt.
317. Seeing one of my friends all torn up over a significant other and not knowing what to say… since I have no emotions.
318. Peace Tea is becoming mainstream.
319. When I get out of the shower and my legs are still a little wet, then my pants are too tight to pull up.
320. Art is the best way to say fuck you to reality.
321. Dope is dope that’s why they call it dope.
322. What? You don’t freshly press your tea? Then I can’t drink that. Nope, nope.
323. So many loans from art school, but I’ll be able to pay them off with my paintings or photography.
324. Hookahs burn weed to fast.
325. That awkward moment when you pass a person who is more hipster than you.
326. Hating Rebecca Black is too mainstream. So I have to love her.
327. What the feck. Someone spilled PBR on my favorite derelict porch and I sat down in it. I can’t wash these jeans, they’re raw denim!
328. The new Tumblr dashboard.
329. Hipster haters.
330. When my mom puts my American Apparel sweater in the dryer.
331. People don’t understand that I bought my purple American Apparel hoodie years before Justin Bieber did.
332. Hard music is never hard enough.
333. Coffee is too mainstream. Drink tea.
334. My favorite band became mainstream.
335. Taking 4 hours to make it look like you just got out of bed…
336. I just saw lyrics from one of my favorite bands on someone else’s status… What the hell do I do now?
337. Ugh. There’s so much work to do that I might as well just not start it.
338. Lighters are too mainstream. That’s why I carry matches.
339. I draw the infinity symbol on everything.
340. Tumblr isn’t MySpace, people.
341. American coffee is overrated.
342. Sometimes I think I dream too much and reality has become a foreign concept.
343. My headphones are broken in one ear.
344. I just exposed my film. Shit.
345. Arcade Fire won album of the year and is going mainstream.
346. Justice clothing store made the peace sign mainstream. Now you see little 8-year-old girls running around with bejeweled peace signs on their shirts. Ugh.
347. I can’t decide what scarf to wear to the Crystal Castles concert.
348. When people think hush puppies are fried food, (the hush puppy shoe was made popular by a group of hipsters, it was the first recorded term “hipster”).
349. Hanging out with my non-hipster friends embarrasses me in front of my hipster friends.
350. When you take the perfect picture on your film camera, then later realize your focus wasn’t right.
351. I don’t have a lot of close friends. But I do go to a lot of concerts.
352. I want friends, but all I’ve got is this jar of buttons.
353. Awesome party. If only there was a stoop…
354. Look, if you have to ask why my laces are different colors, then you will never know.
355. When the only store that has Urban Heritage clothing closes near you and you don’t know what to do.
356. I don’t brush my hair because I don’t need to.
357. When non-hipsters talk about something being too mainstream, it makes me want to beat them with a trash can.
358. Liking Nutella doesn’t makes you a hipster. -.-
359. Anything but written tattoos are so passe.
360. I really want to get these song lyrics tattooed on my wrists.. but that would be mainstream. Fuck.
361. I don’t have a trust fund.
362. Canon and Nikon are just too mainstream to use as a camera. That’s why I use the GE x5 camera.
363. I can’t go anywhere without seeing someone I know, even though I live in a major metropolitan area. I hate it.
364. Spending your entire paycheck on American Spirits and coffee.
365. I hate 99.9% of people.
366. I don’t have a social life… the only relationships I have are with my pen and paper.
367. I just bought $70 worth of floral print from Urban Outfitters.
368. I knew about the invisible children way before Kony 2012.
369. I ate too much hummus and the only thing that will make me feel better is a Marb 27.
370. Instagram is too mainstream now that it’s available for Android.
371. Addendum to #101: If your backwards name still isn’t obscure enough for you, just use a word you like. (Ex: Cathedral, Astronomic, Sofa Loveseat).
372. There are dubstep beats in the latest Internet Explorer commercial. Kill me.
373. When you started following “TheHipsterProblems” on Tumblr before everyone else…
374. Saying betch because bitch and beotch aren’t obscure enough.
375. “Freaks and Geeks” only had one season.
376. My favorite underground record store closed, due to not enough business. Figures.
377. Shoot. Dropped my joint into my ukulele, how do Hawaiians deal with this?
378. Pyramids are the new triangles. Get with the 3rd dimension already, jeez.
379. Why doesn’t IHOP buy their eggs locally?
380. …What do you mean Nutella isn’t organic?
381. Kindle? iPad? I only read used paperbacks.
382. Does this come in triangle?
383. Yeah, I have 20/20 vision. That’s why my glasses don’t have lenses.
384. I don’t do normal showers, like I hardly wash my hair. When I do, it’s greasy looking for the first couple of days and looks nicer as days go by.
385. When I have to move because they closed all the American Apparels in my city.
386. I liked Nigel Thornberry before everyone else on Tumblr did.
387. I only use Vimeo because everyone else is using YouTube.
388. When your new dream catcher that hangs from your rear view mirror is too long and catches on fire when you light the incense on your dash.
389. I have a tan line from my bangs.
390. I have to put a nose in my smiley face because “:)” is just too mainstream.
391. When everyone wants to play my ukulele.
392. Vinyl has become too mainstream, so I make due with cassettes.
393. I bought a used camera off of eBay and when it came in the mail, it was broken.
394. Apple doesn’t make an iPhone with enough memory to hold all my music.
395. When you’re the only fucking hipster in Montana and all the country people hate you. Forever alone…
396. Spilling coffee on your favorite novel.
397. Finding the perfect 4 letter name for your SLR camera.
398. Being mistaken as gay.